“When one door closes, another one opens… but in the hallway it’s hell!”
It’s the in-between times that we want to rush through. Waiting for one thing to end before another begins. It’s enervating and uncomfortable. Being in transition is really scary. We can’t stay where we were and we haven’t arrived at where we are going.
It’s the space while waiting for the divorce to be final. It’s the time between handing in your resignation and serving out your two weeks. It’s the season between your break up and the next relationship. It’s that uncomfortable place when you realize you’ve become addicted and you haven’t found a suitable substitute.
My yoga teacher Jody taught a whole class on the transitions. He said that the transitions between the poses are poses too. They are part of the growth. They are part of the experience. Staying connected to the Flow, we wait for the next phase of our development like a server waiting on a table. We watch, we are ready to respond. If we are rushing through, we may miss something. Remember that everything has a purpose. Nothing is wasted. Pay attention in the hallway. Practice trusting, practice self-compassion, practice self-forgiveness, practice patience. Practice. These things don’t come naturally to beings of the human variety. They are counter-intuitive. It’s easier to whine and moan, “When I get _______ THEN I’ll be happy”. Hate to break it to you but you won’t be happy then either.
How? How do we hang out in the hallway without losing our mind?
- Become keenly aware of now. What’s happening now? What do you see now? What is the temperature? What do you hear? What do you smell?
- Recognize the impermanence of now. Nothing stays the same, everything changes. In the spring, the pear trees bloom white. In the summer they will be green. The fall will bring yellow, gold then finally red. The winter they will go dormant and drop all of their leaves.
- Keep moving. Don’t sit on the side of the symbolic road waiting. Keep your eyes peeled for the next action to take and take it. Do the next thing. Do it right. Do it with your best effort and intention.
While it’s tough to be in the transition, if you keep your focus on the now, instead of looking back to the past, romanticizing how wonderful it used to be (or how terrible) or taking a future trip ( my life is going to be so ah-MAH-zing when we get there) you’ll be less prone to misery and impatience.
Just for Today
I will remember that this too shall pass and to just let it be.
Help me to stay here in the transition. Help me to trust that you are working on my behalf. I have heard that I should let go and let God. While I am waiting that you are at work. Help me trust that more. Give me the knowledge of what you would have me be in this transitory time and give me the power to become that.